In all honesty, I just don’t think you can please the crowd as a whole, but still.
Okay so a little background is in this entry.
There is a video there, of this youtube creator, and book reader who is tearing Sarah Maas a new asshole.
And admitted I think Maas deserves a lot of that criticism. But not all of it, I sorta feel like this creator does bring up some points about Maas’ authorship in general that is just not fucking fair, and it feels like she is harping on Maas for the sake of harping, – just because someone decided that Maas is “problematic”.
And why is she problematic you might ask? Well there are many reasons, too many for me to go into here, I do point some out in that entry above, like her repeated use of black characters as supporting characters, only to end up dead, evil or servants, – to her main characters. And I mean as an author I understand the use of supporting characters that need to go when they served their purpose… but Sarah for fucks sake, did they all have to be black and/or ‘unattractive’.
I am not politically correct per se, but even I take issue with that. Due to reasons I also mention in that entry, about unnecessary characters shoehorned in there to tick the minority box.
Now it’s mentioned in that video as well, being one of the youtube creators points of ‘ick’ – and that is her word, not mine. Ick.
See I never read any of Maas’ books, I don’t give a shit about magical YA stuff, I mean I never read Harry Potter either, because I don’t fucking care.
But if I go off what the creator said (roughly), go watch the video if you want it verbatim. Maas have these young men who serve in someone’s army, and apparently the creator think there is a weird vibe of gay there. She says it’s icky how Maas sexualises this minority group. And the creator doesn’t say ‘gay men’, but it’s pretty obvious that is what she mean, because she does show us a piece of art with 3 very fit young men.
So she isn’t mad about the ‘servant’ stuff when it comes to these characters, no she is mad because she find the description of their dynamic weirdly sexualised in a “war buddy warrior way” – or what it was she called it.
And this fucking bothers me.
Dude…
So we can agree she isn’t really doing great on her representation or general authors ethics, but to lash out her for having some gay vibes between warriors? That is just far out.
And as I talked about in this entry, the fanfic community isn’t exactly a united bunch either.
However this has been a debate since the fucking SJW movement hijacked tumblr or something. So it’s an old debate, that’s all.
There are many readers and authors who take offence to people writing about groups of people that does not include themselves. This means white people shouldn’t write black people, no matter how well written it is – they will always get shit for it. And straight people shouldn’t write gay people.
I can’t tell if it’s because you just don’t see gay or black authors accidently write caricatured characters which are straight, white or whatever. Or because it’s somehow okay with that ‘omg ick’ crowd, because I can’t recall ever hearing about it… however that doesn’t mean it doesn’t exist. I hardly think that skin color or sexual orientation makes you a better or worse author.
I bet y’all know what a thirst-trap is, and that has been a debate since some groups of people started to read things differently. You know, those people who partition for childrens songs to be re-written to be non offensive. Or try to cancel authors who have been dead for 100 years.
I could say a lot about how I think it’s absolutely brain dead to hold authors who wrote something like 100 years ago, up to todays standards. Because their world was very different, and what they wrote back then – well that was perfectly socially acceptable. And you just can’t scrub the world for everything you don’t like. And yeah I am talking about HP Lovecraft, and his use of the N word, specifically.
In the slipstream of these morons, emerged something worse. The “fetish watchers”…. You know those who will descend upon any author, published or fanfiction. ragging on them for fetishising certain groups of people, if they include them, or write about them.
The people need to fucking shut up and go away.
And I mean that in the most direct and literal way there is.
So their logic is as I touched down on above.
Girls can’t write men
Straights can’t write gay
Whites can’t write black
…And so forth. Meaning you can basically only write what you are and what you know. Okay then, that is kind of delulu – but let’s keep that in mind for now. You can only write what you know.
Then tell me why the author of the Witcher, Andrzej Sapkowski. Got tons of flag, people seriously tried to fucking cancel him when the tv series came out, because there were no brown people in his books. I think the tv series added some, and hey man – that’s great! And allow me to gatekeep a little, which is something I rarely do.
But they only know those books exist because they all tuned in to the tv series, why did they do that? Henry Cavill is why…
And then proceed to lash out at this author because they don’t have minority representation? Honey – That is so American I don’t even know where to begin. Do you know how few black people are in Poland? And do you realise he is like 75 years old? Let me tell you, the odds that he even saw a black person in real life before he was adult is none.
He doesn’t avoid black people in his books, he just didn’t include them because he wrote what he knows.
So.
Let’s sum up this bullshit.
You can’t write minorities if you are not one yourself.
You can’t not write minorities because then you are discriminating.
Make your sense make sense, for fucks sake.
And that is what I mean when I say you can’t make everyone happy, because no matter what the fuck you do, someone will find a way to say something is ‘problematic’ in your authorship.
So as a woman writing predominantly gay men, do I fetishise them? Not by a long shot, and I actually do not have an answer for you, as to why I write what I write.
I don’t feel like I write ‘soft men’ either. Actually I think they are pretty normal for the most part. I write gay men, like I’d write any other character, the difference is in who they want to kiss. It is not defining for their character, unless it’s important for the plot, like in Heart Shaped Tattoos.
And even if I am not a gay man, I do take offence when I hear that argument. Mostly because it’s so far fetched I can’t even.
Look, you can write any character you want, as long as you do so with respect and love. Also it’s not fucking magic, because if you unravel all the societal norms we are taught, we are all the same – you know the human species. Like there is absolutely no scientific basis for ‘women acting different than men in a crisis situation’, or ‘women are better to raise children’. Technically, as a species, we are the same. The reason things are perhaps different, they are all taught to us. It is not genetics. There is no scientific proof that women and men should not think alike, if only our gender roles were not a socially dictated.
The chromosomes that determine your birth gender, does not sit in your fucking brain. And both men and women have testosterone and estrogen in their system from birth.
And now don’t think I make this argument because I don’t believe in genders or whatever. No I am making this argument to point out that in theory there is no reason why I as a woman, wouldn’t have the same thought process as a man in the same situation.
Now I am not your typical woman, and like Otis I was formed by a very non-gendered and pragmatic approach. I mean I just liked ‘boy’ stuff better, and I was very much a daddy’s girl in the way I’d follow him like a shadow. I would learn how to curate fur, how to behead chickens, how to fix my bike, how to build stuff, make bonfires, fix the shower fixture, and how to hotwire a car (or any other simple engine, like for grass-mowers and stuff.) – and the list goes on. I know how to take a lamp, a fixture and make it work with your damn light switch. So yes, I am very much practical – I even know how to weld, I have a certificate for that.
Just pointing out I was never ever a girly girl. I played football for fucks sake, and climbed trees, and was the one to pull the leeches off my friends when we ventured into the nearby marsh, cause our parents would pay us for pretty cattails. I shit you not.
So when I make the claim about gender roles being a social construct, it’s both because I know that according to societal norms in general, I am just not feminine, neither in appearance, or reasoning…
Let’s go there, let’s talk cultural norms. Because the Danish culture when it comes to dating, or marriage. Is very different from for instance the American, which seems to be the prevalent one on the internet.
But also because I come from a culture that doesn’t cater to women like for instance the American culture does. Danish men are not obliged to pay for your food, nor are they necessarily the breadwinner and by culture norms we split things equally, or fairly. Because as I said, women make the same money as men hired in the same position.
I was never not the breadwinner for instance, regardless of the gender of the person I dated.
But as a rule of thumb, it’s the one who invites who pays. So if I ask you if you wanna go see a movie, I pay. But if it’s a recurring thing, we would take turns paying.
I promise you that Danish women would be very uncomfortable with having someone pay for them, that would be seen as condescending. In my culture, if the man insisted on paying more than once, that would be a major red flag. I mean everyone likes to be pampered, but in Danish culture it’s also very outspoken that it’s a privilege to ‘give’, this means, when you pay the meal, you’re basically saying ‘this is on me because I have more than I need’.
And that is basically why no Danish woman would be comfortable with it, because in a way it’s like a weird unwanted flex.
Now the men, knowing what you know now. Believe me, they would never expect to pay a second time. And if they ask you to split the bill, that is a very Danish way of saying ‘we’re equal’.
It is incredibly important to Danish women to be independent, and I guess that is why alimony (or spousal support) is incredibly rare here. If you earn more than your spouse regardless of gender, you can’t apply. But I have never ever met a singular person in Denmark who applied for alimony. Including myself, I didn’t want anything from him. I just wanted him to fuck right off. But apart from that I couldn’t apply for alimony, because I make almost twice of what he did.
So now you know, paying for things is not gendered according to Danish norms, it is determined by your economical situation, and also respect. I know there is a whole thing about men feeling small and castrated if their girlfriend or wife earn more than them, or pay for their broke ass all the time. And so if you read any of what I just said. In Denmark, that would work both ways, simply because no one would like feeling inferior, – it is a privilege to give. right?
This doesn’t mean that Danish women don’t like being pampered, we do. I mean if someone said ‘let’s go out, I’ll pay whatever you want. come on!’ I’d fucking love it! But then I’d know before we left, and I would see this as a gift given because they wanted to show me they love me, appreciate me and wish to do this while I am at the wheel.
Yeah you heard that right. Because if you said that to me, or most Danish women. We’d expect to make the plans, and you to follow and pay because you love us. That would be a gift. Where as if you said that, and already made the plans and I just had to follow while you paid, that would be that uncharming weird flex again.
I don’t want your fucking £200 bubbly, if I was in reality more of a beer girl.
We’re not that complicated, just think of us like your buddy with boobs. Who need to feel like they are doing you a favor for dating them. Because truth is, we don’t need you. hahaha
Danish women are not dependent on men, nor is there any social stigma associated with divorce. It’s also completely normal for the groom to take the bride’s surname if it’s cooler, and keep it after the divorce if they want to.
When it comes to children, I live in a culture where abortion is normal, free and not judged. Actually it’s none of anybody’s business if you decide to terminate a pregnancy, but it also means teen moms are rare, teen marriages even more rare. Teens have no business having children, end of.
And I can tell you the abortion rate isn’t rampant, no one wants to have one. But sometimes it’s the best or only solution – if you ask me that is. I mean my oldest she got pregnant because, yeah well – teenage stupidity, when she was 16. I made her get rid of it super early, so it could be done medically (with a pill), but there is no fucking way she is having a kid at 16, I might add I didn’t drag her there kicking and screaming. She didn’t want a baby then, and she is 29 now, and still don’t want a baby.
So because we are in complete control over our income, and our bodies. There is literally no reason for us to get a spouse, or a lover. We do so because we want to, not because we need to. We expect to be equal to the man in every way, we expect them to take half the child care, half the cleaning, and half the house repairs and so forth.
I explained this to kinda make it clear that I did not grow up in an environment, or a culture that cater to ‘feminine helplessness’ or ‘helpless = attractive’.
And just to return to that video about Maas, well it’s not Maas making it weird, it’s the fucking youtube creator. She went there, and she said ‘ick’ – even if it’s just a ‘vibe’, not a written out thing, or a theme.
And dude I haven’t read the book, the creator have. And Maas could describe this in a corny, cringe way – I don’t fucking know. But on face value from seeing that video. The creator is grasping at straws to make Maas more problematic than she already is – which I find pointless to be honest.
And I find this approach problematic in it self… yeah so I find those who ‘search for things to make problematic’, very problematic themselves. Confused?
Also if I write ‘problematic’ one more time, I’ll need a drink.
Anyway. I do find it very troubling that someone like that creator, doesn’t think about the tone she is setting, I mean people watch her video, and either they go ‘omg this and that author is problematic then’. (okay I gotta go get my Gin)
Or young budding authors who hear that and go ‘shit I can’t write this story then’. All in fear of being called out for something imaginary.
And I find that extremely concerning.
You can’t fucking tell people what to write. How dare you? This is not a book review. No, it’s a video on ‘bad authors’. So even if the creator goes through the book and rips it apart, the video exist to highlight how terrible Maas is.
Again, not a fan of Maas – I don’t care about her. And she could be a massive cunt for all I know. So please don’t think I am defending her, I am not. I am just pointing out, that the critique I see in that video isn’t totally fair. And how the creator of the video plays into some weird double standards where no author can come out squeaky clean.
I wonder if she holds her favorite authors to the same standards?
To make my point we need to look at the fandom community for a moment. Because they aren’t exactly exempt from double standards either.
So to keep it relatively short, you find the same asshats there as you do in the published sphere. The differences are they didn’t pay for reading the fanfic, and also they might have strong opinions or emotions when it comes to their favorite characters from whatever media.
Right, this is where most drama start. You know when people are outraged because someone did X-character dirty. According to the reader at least.
So I had this very interesting conversation with someone yesterday, about the absolute mindfuckery of ‘correctness and fandom norms’. Because it has become a fucking mindfield to navigate when you’re my age. I don’t even understand what the problem is half the time.
Gen X, what can I say?
But what was so interesting about that conversation was this quote.
[…] get all condescending when it comes to politics and other lgtb topics we don’t see eye to eye on (like how straight characters are allowed to be not straight in fic, but lgbt people can’t be straight. That sort of thing)[…]
And they are right, they are absolutely fucking spot on!
This is a thing.
So let’s take someone like uhm… Dorian from Dragon Age Inquisition, he was just the first character I could think of which was strictly gay. And just to keep the theme, let’s take Cullen Rutherford from Dragon Age as well, because he is strictly straight.
This is not something I say, those are them game mechanics, sis.
So the “logic” is that Dorian is gay representation, where as Cullen isn’t representing fuck all. This is why installing a mod that makes Cullen respond to a male Inquisitor is okay, but not if it’s Dorian and a female inquisitor.
Excuse me, I thought this was a role playing game? And I can’t for the life of me understand why the characters even have sexual preferences, couldn’t they just be ‘playersexual’ and that would be that.
And do they grasp the concept of fanfiction?
Fanfiction is what happens, when you either feel the need to fix something, or for something to pan out in a different way, or want to explore something that wasn’t explained or explored in the chosen media.
That’s it.
So what if I thought, nah Dorian he definitely have an affair with Cassandra, there’s some unresolved tension there. I can’t because that is punishable by goon-squad aggro commenting.
But for instance I was convinced Cullen had the hots for my Warden Commander, and I never for one moment thought he was straight, no joke, I seriously didn’t. Even in DA2 they give him nicknames like ‘curly’ and he seems so weirdly awkward when with Hawke for instance. I wrote fanfiction about that, you bet I did. But that’s completely okay for most.
I won’t say all, because you still find those canon purists out there.
And listen I don’t give a fuck about what you imagined when playing it, this is my fanfic, and I’ll write what I want to – don’t like it, well jog on,Sir. (or madam)
And I think the trend to call authors out for fetishising minorities, or misrepresenting minorities, all come from this place… it all originated in the cesspool that is overly vigilant fanfic readers.
And just to make it clear, some authors are absolutely guilty of fetishising and/or misrepresenting groups of people.
And I think there is a huge difference between writing a smut and not writing smut. I honestly don’t understand why those people feel like gatekeeping something so weird, and at the same time call people out for it.
The double standards are wild.
I don’t feel attacked or problematic (there we go again), but it frustrates me how that narrative is still alive somehow. Could you just not read the stories or books that has a description that bothers you. Do you need to go hunting for something to offend you?
I have a huge problem with what we in Danish would call ‘problem finding culture’, so a state of mind where you point out all flaws you can find, no matter how far fetched. And never mentions what works.
As an example I recall from somewhere I worked, a colleague talked about Adele, the singer. And pointed out her hair was stupid, and she was fat and boring.
Can we agree that Adele has an amazing voice?
Dude it’s fine, you don’t like Adele, I get it. But did you need to search for superficial ‘reasons’ for it?
That is exactly how those people sound in my ears. Not sorry.
To finish this much too long ranty entry.
I say you write what you fucking feel like, do what your muse tells you to. You don’t need to reel it in, or downplay anything.
If you write what you do with respect, love and care. Educate yourself, and have different people, with different cultures, read your script.
Then you did what you could. And some will hate it, and perhaps some will like it, even love it. But you can’t’ base your authorship on what others want to read.
DREAMS OF A LOST MOONCHILD 
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