I did some posts on why I stopped being social and writing fanfics, like these
the mass effect big bang has been a fucking headtrip this time, and since this is my personal blog, and not a single fucking soul is going to read this. I have no problem with calling people out, I will however not mention their names, not because i have a problem putting them on blast, but because they would love it, and there is no way I am willing to cater to their need for attention.
And I do have the receipts for all of this, and I promise you it’s not something I am just claiming,
So the first thing was this author named U and an artist named S. So thing is that S had gone off the radar, and U was about to post like four days after they first sent an email to the MEBB inbox.
And I take full responsibility for not checking the inbox for the event, but seriously we were halfway in the posting, and there had not been a single mail in a month or something, so I admit I slacked.
Anyway U contacts me via pm on discord, and I go check the email. I have tried this before where one part makes unsubstantiated claims, so I insist on giving the artist S, a day (as in 24 hours, because of timezones) to get back to me or U. They do not get back to me, and U does not make me aware that they had been in contact with S.
At one point U does admit to having contact with S at a later date than they first said, and copy pasted some messages, and I admit that their version sounded fucking far out, and I did laugh at the excuses. But still there was something kinda off, and I couldn’t put my finger on it.
So S doesn’t get back to me, and U suggests to get their own artist, I ignore the request because it’s against the rules, and then insist on sending out their story for the pinch hitters, but the thing is this author is very, very particular which is more than obvious from their initial snippet. And also don’t care to read the rules, but that belongs in another rant, at some other time.
One pinch hitter T offers to help out, but they are on vacation with family. I send an email to both U and T and asks that U send T a chapter, a summary or something for her to work with, since by now T has less than 24 hours. I offer to make the banner for them so they just have to shoot the art off. Apparently this offends U greatly, who sends me a flurry of messages on discord, which she since deleted, but I still had them on my summary on my phone, which i took a screenshot of. They basically claimed that it was very offensive to them that I had dared say that the artist could work with a snippet, and how upset it made them that ‘their artist’ didn’t at least have the time, and decency to read the story.
I might mention that in this initial email I sent to both U and T for the pinch hit, then besides saying they could send T some summary or outtake from the story to work from, then I also suggested moving the posting day, so T would have more time.
Also ‘their artist’ rubbed me real wrong.
U sends me an email, and I can tell this is shortly after she deleted the messages in my DMs about how offended they were and they were leaving and I sucked. But thing is, I didn’t see any of this because they sent those messages and that email, in the middle of the goddamn night (in my timezone). As I said, the ‘never have i been this insulted’ dm’s were deleted when I checked discord real fast while drinking my morning coffee, and so I went to work, as one does, and didn’t give it more thought really.
I don’t check my personal phone when I work besides on my breaks or commute, and neither of those times are really very opportune to deal with frustrated people, because I do not have the time to actually sit down and do anything, I’d have to just throw them a bone like ‘I see your message, will check later’ – but truth is, later is very often 10 minutes to these people, and I cannot have my phone constantly vibrating just because some pissed off person from the internet wants my attention. Later means later, as in when I have the time for fucks sake.
So when I get home from work, they wrote me a dm, throwing yet another fit because I didn’t answer in a timely fashion, on ‘the mail sent yesterday’. Okay listen, that was not yesterday for me, that was like 4 in the morning, and why is it so hard to grasp the concept of 1. I am in a different timezone 2. I need sleep 3. I have a real job for grown ups 4. I have other people in RL demanding my attention too, – oh yeah, they are called children – I have them.
I do the mebb in my spare time, it’s that simple. I have a life, fucknut! Sorry you don’t, but deal with it, man!
Anyway, the email from U is for me only, not including T – she never responded to T’s inquiry about the pinch hit, which is pretty fucking rude. And way I see it, U did agree to send her story out to pinch hitters to begin with. But U tells me that she knew an artist who would love to do her art, and if I recall correctly, they had actually already begun. And of course U would pay this dear friend for this art. Oh fuck off, you are paying someone to make you something, they are not your damn friend, like why would they want money for something for a dumb fan event?
I think you commissioned this art by a stranger, perhaps acquaintance. And you are not paying them because ‘zomg I am so embarrassed about asking them for this favor’, and how much they adore my story.’ You are paying them, because they require payment to make your shit. Just how stupid do you think I am? seriously?
And also T was doing them a fucking favor. There is no way anyone can ask the pinch hitter to read a 30k story (that is what U claims for wordcount). Actually it’s stated in the rules that no author can ask the artist to read anything that above that 10k mark which is the big bang goal.
Anyway, in this email where she introduced me to the fact (she didn’t ask, she just stated this was what they had done) that she would pay her imaginary buddy for art, she also asked for her posting day to be postponed like I had initially suggested (referring to the pinch hit by T). She suddenly had a change of heart apparently, now with this dear friend of hers who both adored and appreciated her obvious talent, and gift for writing coffee shop AU – well, it was fine to move posting day, because talent need time right? – I did not respond to this email, yet,
Instead I sent a dm to T, asking her if U ever got back to them, mostly because I worried that T was working on that art out from the very lengthy snippet I had sent to all the pinch hitters. And by now I had reason to believe that U would just either ignore or reject whatever T made at this point, also T wasn’t aware of the shift of days, prolonging the timespan for creating some art, so she could wait till she returned home from said vacation.
T told me they had not heard from them at all. Ever. But they also told me they had not started the art yet. I sent T the email that U sent to me about this mystery artist. This upset T quite a lot, and rightfully so.
In the end I told T to not make anything for U, and just ignore it.
Now I admit I wasn’t sure what to do by now, because I really can’t let them commission an art piece, that is against the rules, but I could tell from the super unhinged conduct that U had in general, that doing so would land me in a world of drama, which I also didn’t want.
This is when the original artist S, got in touch with me, she told me how they had had a medical emergency, and that they were very upset because of the verbal abuse that U had given them throughout the entire ordeal. I asked for screenshots, and boy did they give me screenshots.
Reading through their conversation, it was very clear to me that U never intended on using S’ art to begin with, she was honestly absolutely disgusting in her conduct towards S, who did actually offer to fix it – days before U wrote me and claimed they were ghosted by S. And within S’ screenshots there was a comment about U blaming S for having to deal with ‘subpar’ art, or somesuch – this was clearly in regards to T and the pinch hit.
T is actually super talented, but that is besides the point.
And that is when I realised, this had been U’s fucking plan all along. She wanted to enter the event, manipulate everyone around her, and bring an artist of their choosing, paying for the art she wanted, so nothing would reflect badly on her masterpiece (which honestly sounded super fucking boring from the snippet, which is why S sorta pity picked her – it’s insane, but I suppose it’s just us peasants who knows nothing of fine art fanfiction.)
And then I responded to U, telling her that she could get the last date of the event, and I know no one is going to read anything that day, because everyone is either commuting or have a hangover. I told her this mystery artist would have to oblige by the same standards as any other artist in this event, such as having a art link, and make both an art-piece and a banner in a specific size.
And as I said before, I am a petty bitch, and I know how to manipulate ppl too, that is basically what i do for a living for fucks sake. So before I answered her, I made this ‘vibe’ digital manip for them as art, and told her I based it on their snippet, because that was all I had.
Never did she even acknowledge it, she just kept on talking about whatever she was talking about, not even a stupid emoji… nope. Nothing.
And that is when I knew, girlfriend is a fucking sociopath, seriously, I can’t diagnose people, I am not a doctor. But I am telling you, the only reason she did this, is because she was banking on no one else talking to each other, and that I am her ticket into this event, so she has to make me think that she is doing me a favor by bringing her own artist. And everything else she just ignores, because if she doesn’t give it attention, it doesn’t exist?!
You know I was married to a man with severe mental illness for many years, and that is very much like that. The whole it’s not me, it’s them.. they don’t appreciate me the right way, don’t you think? And now that we are here, I am going to disregard everything you just said or did, because I need it to be like this, don’t you understand that it would be much more convenient for me like this, and you don’t want me to just give up, do you?
Oh I see you.
And I know I just let them kinda have it, choose your battles, right? But one of these days I will have to contact them, and remind them of what we expect of this artist, in order to run her story. I will almost bet anything they are not willing to comply to that, and will say ‘yeah well I don’t feel like including my story in this event anyway, I will upload this on my own terms and time’ – I am quite sure she never did intend to participate, I mean she did ‘quit’ twice, and changed her mind.
And now she is silent.
Yeah… she thinks she got what she wanted, but she really didn’t. That is where the smarts is in not being directed by emotions and ego, simple as that. I’ll make an update when I know what she does.
And I promise I will write the silliest mass effect fanfic, should I lose this bet.
When I took back the graphics btw, I changed it and uploaded it to Tumblr, with the caption ‘when you have a surplus Kaidan’ – I don’t know them on fucking Tumblr, and I neither do I want to. But the fact that I deleted all the graphics I uploaded, both this, and the blanks, and she didn’t even mention it – is a testament as to how little she is able to mentalise anything.
Look at it, she don’t care how much she hurt S, and she also don’t care about the favor T is extending to her. She cares about her, her fantastic never before seen, epic fanfic, and she wants it to be the best – because she is the best, she deserves the best art. right?
Deserves it! that is they key word here.
But then another wild snowflake appeared. And this is where it gets real stupid.
So it all starts and ends with Tumblr, even if what happened had nothing to do with Tumblr, but it definitely didn’t help their situation.
For this stage, we have many more players. but at the center we have W, a little girl with too much time on their hands, and a completely unchecked ego.
G who is W’s friend, and also participated in the mebb, as an artist, and at the time of all this fuckerly, already did their posting, – so no one cares.
M who is also a friend of W, and they and like G they were done with their posting, so no one cares about that either.
WN who were a recipient of art that W did, yet to post their stuff, and apparently also a friend of W.
SG who is a longtime participant of the MEBB, mostly as an author, and did the artwork for W’s story.
AS who is an author as well, and was the author to the project where M did artwork.
And P who is an admin.
Ready?
Ready.
It started with me looking through the mebb tag on Tumblr because I wanted to reblog the art the artist did for our entry. And so I saw this weird post made on the same day, it had a banner and a summary – but it wasn’t mine. I went to look at the calender, and it was the story for the day after. And dude it happens, time-zones and all. But then I went to look, not only because I was puzzled by this post, but also because I was made aware of these very bitchy and negative posts aimed at the event, that W had been posting recently, and I went to check it out for real.
W had not only decided to claim that the mebb was run badly, I believe the word they used were ‘abysmal’, they hated it and had a shit time. But they also claimed they had not received any art, so I went to look in my own messages, and files, because I helped SG with her mood-board and playlist, and SG has participated every year without any issues, and so I played detective, as I apparently like to do sometimes, and knowing that W couldn’t have been aware that I helped SG with their submission, I made one of the banners for fucks sake. The one I upload here is anon for a reason, but that is the banner I made for SG to use with W’s story. I am pretty sure W doesn’t know that I made this, because I made it as a favor to SG, and I fully expected SG to just send it along to W with whatever else she sent them.
So I asked P to deal with it (please know at this time, I just settled the other thing, and knew it wasn’t over by a long shot, and I just wasn’t mentally prepared for two primadonnas). But nonetheless I contacted SG, sending them the link to W’s tumblr post with the first chapter of the story, with a banner W made themselves (and yes they credited themselves for their own banner, on their banner… yep, that happened.) But there was no mention of SG on said banner. So I asked SG if they knew what was going on, and if they forgot to send the art.
While I waited for SG to answer I went to check out a post someone made me aware of on tumblr by W, which stated that the artist ghosted them, and they were promised art and didn’t get it, and the wording they chose was ‘breach of contract’ I shit you not. And also they wrote something like ‘I got no art, so now I’m posting the first chapter’ above the chapter with the pretty involuntarily funny banner.
Not only did they throw major shade at the artist, even if they didn’t mention SG’s name in this post, but they also in the same context manage to throw a bonafide pity-party, directing their righteous fury against the event, for allowing this to transpire.
How dare we, right?
Before we continue, I have to mention that neither me or P had heard anything from W about this art issue, actually we hadn’t heard much at all, besides them asking if they had to provide a link when they posted outside the collection. But at no point were we made aware that they had not gotten the artwork made for the collab. Keep this in mind , – feels like a repeat don’t it? because it basically is.
And then I noticed another post, in which W stated that they knew it was against the rules of the mebb, but they didn’t care. It was a dumb rule (and they were of course too cool for rules), and so they chose ‘malignant compliance‘ – dude, try belligerent.
But at this point I let it slide, because they can basically whine all they want on their own blog. I have no business going there in the first place, and who am I to invade their space like that. But I admit it did provoke me like all hell, of course it did! And this is what I mean when I say, even if they weren’t banned for what they said on tumblr, it didn’t exactly help their case either. It’s kinda hard to ignore that someone plays nice, acts normal on the discord server, and then fucking slams you on another site – for all to see. (all of their 6 friends that is. heh)
P and I shared notes, and none of us had in any shape or form, strange or unpleasant dialogue with W. So none of us were sure where all that vitriol came from, it sure as shit isn’t something they ever made us aware of. Not at any point have W expressed any grievances with the mebb, or us; to us.
So SG got back to me, and was absolutely devastated, and they tell me that W hated their contribution, and didn’t want it. And i felt like shit, because no one really wanted W’s story, and perhaps the crazy was evident? I don’t know, they don’t write anything I care to read, so I didn’t even look twice tbh. But I feel like I talked SG into doing this moodboard and a playlist, assuring her that it’s absolutely fine for art.
Which it is, had W bothered reading the goddamn rules.
And while I spend an hour consoling SG, telling them it’s not their fault, and that W was out of order, and acting like a brat. I go back and check W’s story on A03, and right enough, now they uploaded 2 chapters out of at that point 9 (i don’t know if they added shit since). And then I check that tumblr again, and sure enough, they are still prattling on about how they won’t upload all chapters at the same point, and announcing to her enormous cult following that they will get a new chapter with some hours between them. (i shit you not, that is both pitiful and hilarious at the same time)and these 6 friends just circle-jerks with them in the comments, about how lame a rule that is, and she should have the right to upload as she wants to.
Yeah no. That is not how fan events work, sugarlumps.
Anywho, I must admit that I was pretty annoyed by their behaviour outside the event server, we first and foremost had to get to the bottom of the whole missing art issue, as that was actually the most pressing at this point. P and I talked about if we should just let that ‘malignant compliance’ shitshow slide, and pretend we didn’t notice. To instead just make it super fucking clear next year, that this is not okay, trying to find a day to talk over a voice call to go through the rules and the faq for future events.
And then W finally got back to P in their DMs.
Let me tell you, the level of entitlement is strong in this one, and I mean tsunami levels of inflated ego.
At no point does W claim to P they didn’t receive anything from SG. So P points out that they can’t upload their entry sequential, and if they didn’t receive the art work, they should have told us. And mind you, both the chapter thing, and the not including your partners creation, is actually a huge no-go in the mebb, and they know this, otherwise they wouldn’t have made this ‘i am such a rebel’ post on tumblr.
W in complete fucking seriousness, argues that what SG gave them wasn’t art, it was a moodboard. And then proceeds to go on about how unfair it is, how they feel like they got the short end of the stick kinda thing.
They were promised art dammit.
A drawing, not a fucking mood board.
And I wish I was making this up for comic relief, but I am not. That is their argument, they were promised art, and expected a drawing, and all they got was a moodboard, so this equals the before mentioned ‘breach of contract’ in regards to SG. I mean I don’t remember this verbatim, but it was something akin to them questioning to AN, why SG would even pick a story when they can’t do art.
that is so fucking rude, I can’t even.
You read that right, their fucking argument was that a moodboard was not art, and ergo she had gotten no art. And also had the audacity to claim it wasn’t like they were unreasonable. And come to think of it, it was out fault – because of course it was. When faced with the fact that SG did make them art that they just disregarded, completely bounced off their mental teflon armor.
We decide to permaban W, and never has anyone been permabanned from the mebb before. So while P shuts down the chat with W and bans them, I proceed to take down the posts made for that day (which was their story).
W takes to tumblr (because of course they do), and cries to anyone who will listen, claiming they got banned for vent-posting on their tumblr, and it wasn’t like it was serious or nothing, and they were gonna take it down soon anyway.
Like that is not even in the ballpark of reasons to why you were banned, fuckwit!
W were banned for breaking the rules, while flipping us off. No one gives a shit about their stupid attention seeking cry-posts on tumblr…
They can call it ‘vent posting’ all they want, but at the end of the day; it was a flat out lie. They did get the art from SG in a timely manner, they just didn’t want it; however that part is magically missing from the ‘vent-post’.
Because even people like W knows that is not a good look. If people knew she was not only lying through her teeth, but were shown proof of what her counter argument was. They would be appalled, because what she did was to construct a scenario which is not true. This whole fucking thing is their design, because they knew they were lying about the art to people on Tumblr, and they knew they never complained or raised issues with neither P or me – like they in a roundabout way claimed, when they said communication was abysmal.
I wonder if they know a phone line goes both ways.
So P have family over because of christmas, and I am running around trying to prep for christmas too. And a little while later, we team up again, and the ban upset a bunch of people, among those G & M who leaves the mebb discord around the same time as W is banned. But again, no one cares.
And I make a comment on the server about how we had to take down the link, and the user was banned for poor conduct, and have a nice day. kinda thing.
But then..
You thought it ended here right?
Oh my sweet summerchild.
Then, I get a message from AS who is freaking the fuck out, because M, G and W are being super aggro, and it makes her nervous and uncomfortable. I tell her to just block them and to not worry about it. And from what I can deduct from my conversation with AS, I deduct that the person who she had uploaded their project with, M. Had left in a huff from the server, and now she was worried if she should block them, having a feeling that it involved her too. I should mention that poor AS has been the center of a pretty nasty case of online bullying in another fandom, one I am pretty sure at least M is a part of.
And so I went, okay this has to end.
So I wrote a post which i uploaded to all platforms the mebb is on, addressing this issue.
I understand from all the messages sent to me right now, that there is a lot of gossip in regards to the decision from the admin team to permaban an author/artist from the MEBB.
They can think whatever they want, and so can you. But the truth is that X was not banned from the MEBB because of something they said on Tumblr. That is their version of events, and they are absolutely entitled to their own narrative.
But I am here to say that we did not ban X due to any Tumblr posts, it is true we were made aware of some less fortunate things said on their blog in regards to the MEBB. But we have never, and will never ban anyone for something they said on some blog.
X was banned for knowingly ignoring the rules to the MEBB, and for poor conduct when confronted with said issue.
None of this was taken from, or related to Tumblr or any other blog, the ban was purely based on what was sent by X to the event, where said blatant disregard for a basic MEBB rule was evident, and the following conversation.
We do however apologize for the fact that the basis for the ban might not have been made clear to X. Even if we the admin team feel it is obvious, we saw no reason to carry on any conversation as it was not constructive to do so.
We consider this discussion closed, and will not be replying to any messages or inquiries about said issue.
-Azzy on behalf of the MEBB admin team.
And X is of course W, but I didn’t want to blast them, I just wanted to make aware that they weren’t banned for the tumblr thing, even if that is what they claim, and I had honestly thought it would be laid to rest.
And then W did the most pathetic thing I have ever seen, in all my damn years on the internet.
So the second P posts my ‘open message to the mebb about current events’, to the official mebb tumblr. W reblogs it, and writes ‘X that is me‘ – *tips fedora‘ something or other about them being the larger person, and they had been totally willing to let this rest, but we just had to keep the drama going… – in the tags (seriously girlfriend has 90% of her damn posts in the tags). And then she blocks the mebb tumblr.
What the fuck was the point of that?
jesus fucking christ
that is sad
But sure honey, stay in your little echo chamber of bullshit, you are both tiresome and irrelevant to anyone but you and immediate relatives. I’m not sorry, I am a petty bitch and it amuses me to no end, that you can afford to play elitist with 6 friends.
Eventually shit calms down, and P and I have time to talk again. P told me that W was worried about the art they made as a part of the project with WN. And since it was my clear understanding that P had offered W that even if they were banned, the art would run for WN.
But W never responded to that, it’s hard to communicate with someone who blocked you – and honestly we had no way of knowing if they agreed to that or not. But we assumed they did, since they did express concern about the artwork they made for WN.
Eventually I wrote WN and tried to explain that W was banned, but we had told W that they could run the art regardless, that I had the banner and the link , but that WN would have to contact W to get the artwork itself. Also I apologized for the inconvenience and all that, and hoped it was a non-issue, and told them that it was my understanding that W had been worried about this when they were banned, and suggested they could speak to P if they wanted to know exactly what was said. And honestly I had no fucking clue what to tell this person, I mean I didn’t know if W would let their art run in the event at all, and if not – well, WN was shit out of luck, and there wasn’t a whole lot we could do about it. So I crossed my fingers and hoped that W’s thirst for attention was greater than their principles, and that she would just give WN the artwork as planned.
I have not spoken to WN at all, at any point in this years event, but I have to admit that I was a little more than surprised when they responded to me with some nonsensical fucking monologue worthy of Scarlet O’Hara. Again with the ‘this event is horrible, there is no communication‘
I’m like what the fuck? the first message between us, ever ! – is when I sent her that message about banning W and her options. Never have they ever reached out to either me, or P. Like at all, only message they ever sent was that tirade in response to me. You know, the same shit as all the others… Basically; ‘it’s your (being me and P) fault that I am leaving for reasons and stuff – you suck.’ – And the real banger… Her main gripe was, that it took us 5 hours to contact her after W was banned.
And her argument for packing her backs and leaving the key in the mailbox? That was; and I shit you not. What if her posting date had been the day after the ban? She did acknowledge it wasn’t, but what if it was!? Then what? huh? then what! – Perhaps I should be amazed she didn’t demand to speak to my manager or something.
Come the fuck on, how is that even an argument?
You’re right, it’s not.
I mean if it was that big of an issue, she could have reached out to us, right?That is what a fucking normal person would have done. But WN isn’t a basic bitch like the rest of us, no she needs a written invitation in gold letters and an uber to her door.
Sorry man, but I am just so goddamn done with the entitled behaviour. But for reasons unknown WN stayed on the server, even after proclaiming her departure in all caps. I spoke with P real quick and we agreed that it made no sense.
For my sanity I had to kick her from the server, and I sent her a message that this server was for participants of a fan event, and she was more than welcome to rejoin the server, should she change her mind about participating in the future.
We both know she won’t, and I felt good removing her bullshit from my radar.
–
And here we are.
No more, and I just had to get that crap of my chest.
DREAMS OF A LOST MOONCHILD 
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