DREAMS OF A LOST MOONCHILD

You know that famous quote about ‘there’s nothing to writing, you just sit down at a typewriter and bleed’ well I call bullshit!

I mean writing is easy, true. But to write something that someone else than yourself want to read – well that is something completely different.

I am still questioning everything I write, and sometimes force my poor friends to read my shit, just to touch ground and figure out if what I write makes a lick of sense to anyone but me – because I get carried away.

Okay so here is where I am at:

Corpse Raven/Phoenix Reborn: originally the third story for the trilogy, which transformed into a huge monster with a lot of worldbuilding and fractions, and so I chose to change it into a stand alone dark fiction story – but it got stuck because the way the story is told just doesn’t work for a longer thing. Mainly there are a couple of characters that just doesn’t work and needs to be taken out, and this means others have to be rewritten or the plot won’t work at all. And it’s a huge task that I want to do, but it won’t be now. But there”s more to it because…

Nocturnes: originally started to be a dark fantasy mass effect fanfic, that if nothing else, reminded me of why I stopped writing fanfics. I simply can’t do it anymore, not sure what happened, but as I know I talked about before on this blog; my last venture into fanfiction is like 8 years ago, and the story was so dark that it sort of just rots largely un-read on Ao3… and no it’s not because it’s shitty, it’s because it’s too far from canon, and too horror centric. And also includes some themes that most people who read fanfiction doesn’t care for. And Nocturnes turned out ten times darker than the original Cacophonies (not to be confused with the rewritten one you can find here on my blog). And so eventually I had to pull the plug on the notion that it ‘could be’ a fanfic, it can’t. I changed the names, and some other stuff like I did for Cacophonies, and it worked to some extent – because now it lacks a concept and worldbuilding – and so I thought… hey why don’t I take the world building from Phoenix Reborn and apply it here, surely that would be awesome… No.. it wasn’t

The unholy mashup of Nocturnes and Phoenix Reborn was not bad, it was HORRENDOUS! omg what a pile of shit! whatever worked for them individually just died whimpering… and right now I am just mostly annoyed that I have two stories that individually both are above 100 pages long – which is worth less than nothing, because odds are I can’t’ use it for anything… sigh

The Funeral Lullaby: I need to run that through some test readers, but it is pretty graphic, and right now I don’t really know who I could ask to read it. I am not sure what sub-hell in my brain this came from – but if you don’t mind reading graphic adult stuff, violence and death. Hit me up, cause I could seriously do with a test reader.

hahaha who am I kidding, don’t worry dear unexisting reader – I won’t be waiting with bated breath. I see the traffic to the blog yanno, and yeah… no one is ever going to read this.

But speaking of the Funeral lullaby, it needs a new name cause it doesn’t fit. But I simply can’t come up with one. I think I have to make a blurb and get chat GTP working, cause fuck you – that’s why.

And lastly I started working on a story that might be included in the same thing as the three other stories, but I simply don’t know yet. It is however a lovecraftian futuristic thing – perhaps a little warhammer 40k inspired.

Sometimes I feel like I just scream into a void, man.

I can however show you the book covers I made that I am going to stick to. One is missing and that is because I am still working on making a cover I think works.